A brand new you

A new year is about to begin and in retrospect is usual to name accomplishments, compare life now versus the beginning of the year... and write some resolutions short-term/ long-term.

Party in the USA! 10 dos and don'ts

If you ever get a little confused with the American party etiquette, you are not alone!

Holiday season is opened and I share with you some insight of what to do (or not to) as a guest & host. Hope from now on you please Uncle Sam, and be nice according to Santa Claus eyes too!

Guest essentials:

1. Respond invitations ahead

It's polite to show you are making room in your agenda; confirming last minute will send a wrong message (as if you were giving priority to something else). In case you can't confirm with brevity, give the heads up - and make sure to mention when you will be able to answer. Don't stress with the whys, usually nobody cares, everyone just want to better plan the party - and the number of people attending is key. Americans are okay and respectful of people having other plans already drafted, hardly you will hurt someone feelings (but ditching is a different story, be aware).

2. Do not be late

Not sure being on time is actually something only British, as far as I know Americans are pretty much on spot. So don't make people wait (unless they always make you, in which case it wouldn't be disrespectful by default!). Definitely forget the idea of being cool if not punctual - 15min window is tolerated, anything more will present you to the group as rude or careless (here it is considered very selfish to make people run by your clock. Besides, in this country time is a very valuable asset. Get it?)

3. Charm the host

Avoid being empty handed. Lack ideas? Casual events ask for wine, beer, cheese, dessert... Asking the host is not bad! But for special parties I tend to think of a special wine/ liquor, an exotic cooking oil, flowers or a beautiful candle.

4. Be ready to take your shoes off

No shoes policy inside American homes is more common than you can imagine. Most of times people will let you know in advance, but also quite often they assume you would know. Well, now you do!

Hosting Top 6:

1. Prepare ahead

Make a checklist of things to do, and prepare in the prior evening all you can: marinate meat, wash salad and fruits, set table layout... In the day of the event, less is more! So you are ready to greet your guests at the door, and most important: enjoy the party.

2. You set the mood

If you have fun, chances are the whole group will. A friend once told that a party is over when one starts cleaning, and this statement proves to be right all the time for me. Also, I tend to worry too much if there is anything missing, if you are the same... Try drinking another glass and loose it up! My worst nightmare is making people uncomfortable at my place, and I realized I do that when overthinking if they are okay.

3. Arrange a DIY drink station

This is something I have seen quite often here. It is an awesome idea to engage talk among guests, and get the focus away from you if you are busy

4. Get by with a little help

If your event is casual, it is fine to ask guests to bring wine, a side dish or dessert. Just DO NOT make individual calls - either wait for people to offer or be sure to generally add to the invitation "please bring an appetizer of your choice". If anything, you can always ask for some hands when the party starts! One of my friends purposely dont get things ready in time just to engage people, and help conversation flow. Last, NEVER ask for help cleaning up! People who would like to (help), will make their way.

5. Favors

Special events require a small favor in return, and people really expect it. By special occasion Americans mean Holiday parties, showers, children's and milestone birthdays, welcome/ goodbye parties, house-warming... be prepared!

6. Pay thanks

Always thank your guests. If the occasion was very important, try to send flowers their way. If it was a formal event, a well handwritten thank note works best. But if your party was just a casual affair, no problem keeping it as it is - an email or text message is fine.

Peace, fancy china out & glasses up ladies! Happy Holidays!!

Culinary travel. San Francisco

      Probably most of you try to get advantage of your few free moments and travel whenever it is possible. Choosing the destination, you surely consider prices and length of your stay. What if next time when you have to face the hard decision of where to spend your precious vacation time you will also consider another factor? Consider the culinary experience.

What are you thankful for?

One of the most important days in a year is coming up: Thanksgiving Day. If you have been living in the US for a few years already, you are definitely used to it and you may well have become an expert at cooking a turkey.

English with Joy

     Yesterday without planning for it we went to the movies. It was a nice movie of a good producer and the evening was really nice. Which made me think how great it is going to the movies and understand what the actors are talking about.

The silver lining

It was Election Day in Brazil yesterday. Such a hard experience to watch everything from far without an active participation. As I get disappointed by the second ballot results, I can't help myself comparing and counting all the things that in my opinion make the US one of a kind.

#EXPATWIFECHALLENGE

Hi girls!
     Fall is back again and whether we want it or not, some fall depression and lack of energy can hunt us these days. Last week we had a post regarding being back from vacation ("Deprssed or Reborn?"). So let's not give in to our worst enemy: a depressed version of ourselves. 

DEPRESSED or REBORN? What is your post vacation mode?

Coming back from vacation is always tough. The reasons are simple. Having your feet dipped in the sea is way much better than have them dipped in your office high heels. On vacation, your mind gets relaxed, your body, too. You visit new places, taste new flavors and enjoy new adventures. The vacation life may have very little in common with the everyday life of an expat wife of Philadelphia. But, how can we then cope with coming back to reality?

What to do with your suffering?

Because this open letter says a lot about acceptance and change, it resonates to adjustment phases everyone goes thro at some point in life (in a different scale, of course). I take the opportunity to share it, believing we can learn from it, and make a better use of the conflicts we experience. Hope you enjoy the reading! This is from Liz Gilbert:

Camping, another way to spend your weekend.

"Bugs, not sanitary conditions and uncomfortable sleep"- that's what most people think about camping. Let me tell you what I find in it:

Interview #1

Yes, we are opening space for interviews and testimonials too!!

We are thrilled to hear your stories and make possible to anyone else grow from them. Enjoy & feel free to contact us in case you know someone who can share an interesting point of view!

Today, we are talking to Fabiana!

8 drops of hope: mini vacays!

Planning a weekend getaway takes first time, second a WHOLE weekend available... But what if finding a window at your husband's calendar seems like an impossible mission? My advice: try to do the most of 1 single day!

Don't have friends and family here? Amazing

     Did it ever happen to you to feel lonely? Even if you have the best husband in the world, sometimes it comes a day when you miss hanging out with your family, you miss the company of  your good old friends, you miss the traditions of your country, you miss your habits, you miss your old life... But today is not the day for melancholy. Today is the day to look bright on the possibilities that the lack of your social circle gives you.

A glimpse into an expat wife free time - part 1: FRUIT PICKING

In one beautiful Saturday afternoon three expat wives got together to go fruit picking. Fruit picking was something new for me before. I really didn't remember this kind of activity either in Italy or in Slovakia. So when I first heard about it, it made me really curious.

Doctors and Medical insurance

    Sooner or later you will face the necessity to go to the doctor. Let's talk a little bit about medical insurance and going to the doctor as it may not be exactly the same as in your native country.

A leopard can't change his spots

As much as I believe and support the idea of being always yourself, I gotta say part of adaptation is change. Understanding a new culture is living it. 

All you need to know when you stay in Philly in summer

Is your vacation still a far future or even so unreal as a mirage when crossing a desert? Or maybe even worse and, let's say, you are one of those who preferred going on vacation in the winter months of the year and now you are cursing what awesome idea you'd had.

 I know that it may be hard to realize  you are going to spend the hottest months in a year in Philly but don't let yourself down.

The finish line

What is a perfect image to you? Your perfect collection of humor, habits, posture, manners, education, fashion... most certainly do not fit in the new picture you are part of right now. True? That's culture shock. And it's about time to share how to overpass it...

Already Americanized?

  Hi,everyone! Today I'm writing this post from Italy, I'm here to renew my visa. Oh, yes, when you just think that you are done, suddenly all your documents need to be renewed. I want to share a personal experience regarding expat adjustment stages again. It's when you read something and you think: "Nope, it's not about me!". But then it all seems so true.

Patriotic cake and more

The most important day in the American calendar is here - the Independence Day! Do you know why it is celebrated? And do you know why Philadelphia plays an important role in it? 

And the winner is... Mimosa!

From East to the West coast I find there's nothing more likeable in this country than... a mimosa!

Created on Ritz hotel in Paris, this cocktail drink served initially over brunch gained the graces of Americans and today is also present in many special occasions: weddings, bday parties,

Not shoes talk... or World Cup for newbies

     Some people may think that we, expat wives, have only shopping and spa's in our minds. I bet that some of you like me may be interested in something more manly. Considering we are all foreigners in US, there is a big chance that soccer is popular in your home country.

Moving again...how to get organized

This time we are going to talk about moving. I know that for many of you who moved from a different country and crossed the ocean to reach their husbands, every future move can be considered a piece of cake. A few months after my arrival I had to start looking for a new apartment. When we finally found the best place for us,

Federal Donuts ***

I'm sure you already heard of Federal Donuts, but have you tried it yet?? They run out of donuts so fast, if you don't get up early chances are you never will.

Long holiday weekends

      Amazing warm long Memorial Day weekend! And even if it's already finished, here's some positive thinking: pretty soon we will have a long Independence Day weekend and then at the end of the summer Labor Day. It means that we can already start planning and dreaming

Oh my God those Fahrenheit! How to cope with a cultural shock phase

In our previous post we talked about the expat wives adjustment stages. I would like to talk about the one I'm an expert in: the cultural shock stage. As it was stated in Marianna's post last week, the cultural shock is a period that follows the honeymoon phase. Yay, the honeymoon phase...the one in which you still feel like on vacation, you walk in the center with your head up in the sky dazzled by the skyscrapers and you stop every time you see a squirrel just to try to take a picture of it while eating a nut.
Once this period is over and you start realizing your new life, you also begin to notice all the things that are different from your home country.

Expat adjustment stages?

Since we have put our hearts out lately, sharing our experiences for your understanding of your own emotions and thoughts too, I find appropriate to go over the expatriate adjustment stages in a little more detail here to improve your self-assessment process - I hope!

Cash or Credit?

     When you arrive to Philly, a whole new world of museums, shopping, and dining opens in front of you. But to fulfill all your plans you need to be ready financially. If you have enough cash, you are probably covered. But is it safe to always carry $100, $200 on you being prepared to buy something in case of emergency?

What coffee are you?

Dear friends, I have a confession to make: I'm a coffee addict. Yes, I am. Don't worry, though. It's not that bad. My hands aren't shaking (yet) if I don't have my dose of caffein and I am not getting particularly angry without my cup of coffee in the morning. Anyway, one of the first things I was concerned about when I came to Philadelphia, apart from having my documents ready :),  was finding a nice cafè with a good coffee.

An expat wife heartbeat

All I had was a husband overseas, confidence in my marriage, faith bureaucracy would protect us more than hurt - which means a lot for a Brazilian to say - plus a family asking if I was okay all the time. That was my life more or less a month before my arrival in Philly. Wanna learn what happened next?

Are you open to friendship?

 Today I don't want to drawn you into an ocean of under-estimated expat wives emotions, but rather tell you about building relationships with new people and being open to friendship based on my particular experience.

A self-conscious expat moment

After a few initial months in Philly you may find yourself thinking about how your new American life is. In the first two or three weeks of your stay, it might have still felt like being on vacation. Everything was completely new and very exciting. While you were going around the city to run all the necessary errands related to the documents, house contracts, bills, etc. you also had an opportunity to discover new sites and what’s more, to discover them from a resident, not a tourist, point of view. 

10 ways of giving back to your new community

1. Be welcoming - as much as you appreciate to feel welcome in this new place. Joy runs the world!

2. If you have a work permit, you can volunteer few hours of your week to many projects. To learn more go to www.volunteermatch.org

3. If you don't have a permit

City Escape

If you are tired of spending your time in usual places and hanging out in the city, why don't you push yourself more distant? For folks who love winter sports as I do,

When eating out becomes a treasure hunt

There are plenty of them: Yelp, Tripadvisor, Urbanspoon, Zagat, visitphilly.com, cityeats.com and many more. You might have definitely looked up your latest ideas for a romantic dinner through one of the best known apps and websites which provide food-related reviews.You might have tried some top-rated pubs or restaurants but still, once you try them yourself your point of view is slightly or thoroughly different from Yelp reviews.Why???

How to get things working when you can't work

Many of us don't have work permit, or intention to get back to work. But even when staying at home is a well thought decision, it is important to be busy somehow. It prevents depression, which in some level is already common among expats.

Classic music in Philadelphia

Philadelphia can offer you a lot of possibilities and ideas to spend a Saturday night. Too old to go to disco, still too young to sit at home, we like to have dinners at good restaurants, watch new "oscar" movies or go for night snowboarding at Blue Mountain. Anyways, this time we

Haircut? L'etoile *** (Voilà!)

Hello ladies!

Here we are, just opening a new feature in this blog: making reviews - our side story of the best services in town!

Learn our rates:

*Bad

**Good

***Impressive

I'm starting off rating a hair salon, so here's why

Get the discounts recycling! In Philly you can!

One of the biggest cultural and life-style differences you may encounter first months in the US is a strong pro-client approach. This is a huge topic I can talk about in the future Expat Wives posts, though. What I'd like to point to today is that getting discounts and recycling get together perfectly in Philly! Sounds weird? Just continue reading!

Beauty talk 2. Some tips

Hey, girls. As promised, today, I try to share some beauty tips. (I’ll be happy if this is helpful. If I am wrong about something, just tell me, maybe I just was unlucky that day).

I love infographics

Here's a nice one (made by Overs). Check the adjustment stages and you'll be relieved - patience pays off!!! :)

Adult Playtime

As much as I like quick lists, I have to compromise when the topic is "date ideas" (you wouldn't get enough details, otherwise). Here is a sneak-peak of my favorites things to do as a couple in Philly 

Beauty Talk. Part 1

Changing country after years of relationship building with your hairdresser, perfect eyebrow master (it doesn't matter if she's at the other end of home city, it's totally worth it: if you've ever been a victim of asymmetrical eyebrows, you can understand me),

Your ID Please

One of the first things you will have to do once you move in Philadelphia is to get your ID card. You certainly don't want to go around (and go out clubbing in the night) with your country passport…
Since you will be asked to show your ID very often, get yours as soon as possible!

The Impossible

Have you seen a movie ft. any expat wife role? Here's one: The Impossible.
Naomi Watts performs a doctor, mother of 3 boys, who became an expat wife

Kids Playdate

Philadelphia offers plenty of entertainment for children. If you have little ones you may consider be a member of

Let's make this more fun, pls

The stereotype of an expat wife is just so depressing... Google it and you will find many articles or sayings (okay, not so many sources)

Need English?

There are several places to improve your English skills, here are some to take a look at